× its nothing but me (".)

Saturday, November 24, 2007

On friday morning,
i saw my dad lying in a pile of vomitus.
he remained unresponsive despite our calling.
i saw panadol pack and medicated oil beside his bed..
i know we have to call the ambulance.
soon,the paramedics came and dad struggled.

my second time in the ambulance.
dad's case seems less serious than the previous.
he was awake and was moving about every minute.
the only thing that was not right was he was still quiet-unresponsive.

there i reached the back alley of the emergency department where the resus room is nearest.
i waited at the familiar old spot where i was forced to hear the doctor breaking news to the family members that their family support-the woman's husband,her son's father has passed away.

i broke down.
i thought about his countless time staying in and out of hospital.
yet he entered emergency department again without any advance notice.
he left me crying alone waiting for news from the doctor.

i cant bear sitting alone there.
jie jie and mei mei were still on their way.
mother called to cry and vent out her "wei qu"
the more mama talks, the more i feel that i was not a good daughter.
i have no one to turn to.. i called my best friend.and yet he didn pick up his phone.again.just like the previous time that i needed him.

i weep alone, still no news. even when sisters came, we waited.
finally doctor came out and said he's sending dad to a general ward cos there's no bed in high dependency.
dad is still not stable.
at least he's still alive. i thought silently.we prayed.

when we met up with dad in the ward,he had become very very violent.
daddy was being tied to protect himself from being hurt.... but still he ended up with pretty much injuries.

high fever.
high blood pressure
high sugar level
low potassium levels
GCS=9
stayed hospital all night. sponge daddy. got scratched by daddy.
funny he managed to mutter out mummy's name.hehe.
dad still loves mum.
he was asking her to save him, to release him from whatever.
daddy was in dreamland.
now he's back with us.
this morning,
his condition improved and he even responsed to me.
love love love.
i want to kss him but i only hug daddy.
i'm extremely relieved and happy.
i have a good mood for the whole day. so nice.
ahh... now it's time to have a good night sleep....(dont ever want to sleep over in hospital again=p)

posted at .|8:17 PM|

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

darling boy boy.
really really missing you.
wondering whether there is any email assess in thailand.
just hope you could call over and speak to me.
i missed your call just now.
becos of a boring atchmt.
waiting for yr call since then.
you were right that sending sms over is expensive.
am worried that if i dont reply you, i will not have yr sms anymore.
please say you are alright.
missing you every moment, every seconds....

posted at .|9:25 PM|

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

dont want to blog much today.
upset that i cant go for a run this morning.
sorry quan han for letting areoplane.
i haven got enough sleep.
i've been lazy to run.
have to start on another project work.
never ending.

oh, dad didn get to sleep last night.
got up in the middle of the night to fry egg with bread(one of my fav)
wonder whether he take a few pieces to eat(dad's suppose to keep his diet)

went clubbing last wed to celebrate ling's belated birthday.
taken many pictures.
previous post have some of the pictures taken.
we were very happy wor~
i guess only ling and me get red easily.
we all kiss,hug, laugh,dance, get drunk tgt.
luckily got xinru kept saying"zhier. you can anot, sure cannot de lor.We go home"
haha.but still, we hang around alittle longer and longer..
the first time sisters go clubbing tgt, and that night sleepover at my place.
jie got so many unwanted clothes.
i distributed among us.
dajie's so much smaller size and better figure than me wor~
we lost ling's present at my hse coffee shop.
so sad. it's an accessories from diva somemore.
ling said nvm.we have got a small slice of cake to celebrate for her at 3am wor.
that slice of cake costs6 dollars from sm cafe in clarke quay=x
i want to say so expensive luh
but then for our sister nvm =)

sisters WAN XUI (long -life)

er.. also happy dumpling day to my readers =p

posted at .|11:17 AM|

i blog too much le. neglected my work.
cutelut helped alot. he offered this help and that.

so nice and sweet.

i cant imagine if he's not here to help.
if everyone is as helpful and capable as him.

how nice this world would be.

aniwae. dont want to blog le.

need to get back to project work.

posted at .|1:24 AM|

haha. i forgot to blog
that brad cries when watching sad movies---> make up story by me
i think
it is not too bad when guy cries=p
i do cry too except im a gurl.
no offence.hehe. just fun to make fun of you.

posted at .|12:11 AM|

Monday, June 18, 2007

Projects and projects and projects!!!
probably we will be crushed to death by project loads.
haha. that's too exaggerating.
i'm not good at doing projects but i am trying hard.
people see, people don't.
but i dont care.
i have just completed one on hand.
left with two others. .

didn chat much to boy boy today.
he's busy with army,
while me with my project meetings and deadline.
yesterday too..
cant go his house to complete our jigsaw puzzle.
meng's so sweet to get me a disney jigsaw on our third month anniversary.
his mother looks young for her age and she cooks very well.(haha.dear, i blog bout yr mum too =x)
she gave me many clothes as well(every week somemore) been to dear dear hse for 3 times already.the recent saturday go there.bought cake there.auntie said no need to go to the extent-->she cant finish the food. but i feel bad if i dont bring anything there.auntie really cooks good food. i told her bout the shoes she gave me(chinese saying - cannot give away shoes if not that person will run away=x so auntie asked me to give her 20cents in exchange for the pretty shoes wor..) then i told her i gave it to my friend. i thought i broke her heart for a moment. she said that pair of shoes cost 30 over dollars and i gave that to my friend. i was lost for words at that moment. wonder whether i get any more gifts from auntie. she got great stuff, pretty clothes--> she makes her own clothes too.(Girls out there can come to approach me if you want to buy auntie's clothes)
i was upset bout the shoes but on the other hand, i'm glad that my best friend got that pretty shoes that suit her =)

been blogging for so long le
ahhh..
miss dear dear so much.
think i continure doing my project ba.
finish everything by sun then can leave that day for him..
since he'll be out only on sunday.

want to post our sisters pictures too.
but haven learn how to post it online..
guess i need some cute friend's help again
haha.cant say names.will get myself in deep trouble.
ahh..
miss my sisters as well=)

posted at .|11:37 PM|

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Just came back from dinner with my family. Saw teck zhen with his family there for dinner as well. The food tasted nice but the barley tasted bland. I like the feeling of having dinner out with my family. It's rare that we eat out and most of the time was without dajie there. Sometimes i feel that my family only consists of daddy, mummy, mingxia and me. I don't quarrel with jie as much as we used to. Most of the time you don't see her at home. It feels like home is a hotel to her that we see. It's plainly excuses when she don't come home to sleep at night. She made life difficult for me where in my preceptions that having sleepover at friend's hse is so healthy and fun. Now i'm not able to have that. Mostly i had sleepover given the green light by myself. I have a healthy mindset in whatever i do, i never thought that it was really wrong.. at the most it was just being the mischievous side of me wanting to have some fun not doing it overbroad. I don't upset my parents as much as jie do. Actually i feel like venting this out long ago but i just don't know how to open this to annyone. It may seems i dont care much but in actually fact, i DO CARE alot... so you ppl out there stop asking questions bout my sister..
But still, Happy fathers' Day.. my daddy....

posted at .|10:16 PM|